The Illusion Of Forgiveness

a message from Elleke Rocks
Sunday, 25 July, 2010

The day she left the struggle is the day I putted on garlands.
I was two and my mother decided to divorce. It was the best decision she ever made.

forgiveness I hear so many people around me who are in "relationshifts". They are at a crosspoint in their relationship with their partner. Things need to change, cause they have changed. And they wonder: “Can I divorce my partner? What about the children? Can I do this to my children? I want to stay with my partner for my children.”

All I can do is share my experience. I bless the day that my parents divorced. When I was young people said to me: “Must be hard that your parents are divorced.”

And I always was like: “No. I don’t know how it would be if they stayed together. I am glad they live in different homes now. I wouldn’t have liked it if they would be fighting all the time.”

I know it was a blessing for me that my parents divorced. I don’t know how this is for your children, but what I can do is share my experience. I bless the day my parents chose for passion, for freedom.

I call my mother: Mama Rocks. That is the name I blessed her with, a name of honor because I applaud every step she made and is making for herself into passion.

There are days I don’t like her, and I am angry at her. The last month I felt that I had the opportunity to forgive myself for bringing myself into experiences and with that I forgave her too.

There are many layers in this, and of course I feel there is stuff I can be still angry for. I see it as a chance to open my heart more and to embody more energy of home.

From a different perspective there is nothing to forgive, never ever. It’s a human game we play with each other. And in that game it’s beautiful to experience anger, bitterness, the feeling of being hurt. Although we know we it’s game, our feelings can be so real. We live here in this game. We don’t have to lose ourself anymore in feelings of bitterness, hate, shame, feeling hurt, pure bliss, happiness and joy. We can choose to look at our situation from a different perspective. That gives us the freedom to open our heart and to see the joke of it all. It’s hard sometimes to see this when we sink into our stories, into our drama’s. It’s not something you have to do, you don’t have to change your perspective, for me it sure is a welcome tool to experience more freedom in our life.

Today I honor Mama Rocks for living her life in passion and that she chooses for love every step of the way.

Love Elleke

This message was originally posted here

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